Saturday, February 26, 2011

The Man Squirrel is Going DOWN

Taroko George and his friend Crabby
Crabby and I will take down the Man Squirrel together. Right, Crabby? Just you and me, toots.

The human lady has informed me that I have an upcoming rendezvous with the Man Squirrel. I call him the Man Squirrel because he hoardes nuts... cat nuts. And dog nuts. He stole my nuts nearly a year ago and I have yet to recover them.

The human lady and the human man sat me down the other day and said "Taroko George, we are sorry, but we do not think you are ever getting your nuts back."

"Whaddaya mean?" I asked.

They became very quiet. The human man looked especially sad.

Bastetdamnit! Why are they being so secretive!

I don't care if he shoves a big glass stick up my butt. I don't care if he squirts something up my nose or in my eyes. I don't care if he sticks me with a pin and I pass out right afterward and when I wake up my butt is shaved, there are stitches where no needle should have ever gone and my George Thunder is missing. I am not afraid of the Man Squirrel! And I will make him give me my nuts back!

In the meantime, I will curl up with Crabby. Crabby is the only one who understands my woes. I'm not sure if he still has his nuts, though. I mean, we're close, but not that kind of close.

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